Where to begin? It's been awhile since I have written a blog post. We have had a lot happen. The first I would like to say is that we are still on this journey called grief. There's not a day that goes by that our thoughts don't go to Ambrosia. Some days it results in tears and some days it doesn't. There's no way to know from day to day how hard the grief will hit.
With that being said, after Ambrosia passed Wes and I decided to wait at least a year before deciding if we wanted another baby. A year came and went...then another 5 months went by. We decided to start trying again and am happy to say we are expecting a baby boy at the beginning of October.
Braeden is excited to be a big brother again and really wanted a brother this time. It has also brought up a lot of emotions for him in thinking about his sister and wondering about this baby. A few weeks ago Braeden had his yearly well check up. The doctor that saw him is the same one who initially sent us to Kosair with Ambrosia. He came to the hospital after Ambrosia's diagnosis, called after CT scans, and called after he saw her obituary in the paper. He asked how long it had been since Ambrosia passed and said that now that Braeden is older he may start to think a lot more about the situation and have more questions. Just the week leading up to his appointment Braeden had started making a lot more statements that started with "If this baby dies...". I told the doctor that and he said it was normal.
I told the doctor I had told Braeden that I was doing everything I could to be healthy to ensure the baby was healthy. The doctor at that point stopped me and told me that what happened with Ambrosia wasn't my fault. In my heart I know that to be true but I can't help but take precautions as no one really knows the cause of childhood cancer. I also said that I told Braeden I couldn't promise this baby wouldn't die. That is not a realistic thing to promise a kid especially when we have been through what we have.
I have had one high risk ultrasound and so far everything looks completely normal for this baby. All development looks good and nothing out of the ordinary can be seen. I will have another high risk ultrasound this month and the doctor specifically wants to see the liver to ease his and my mind since Ambrosia's tumor was on the liver.
In other news, this year in April our house flooded with almost 20 inches of water. This was the second time since October of 2013. The first time was just 4 months after Ambrosia passed and was incredibly hard and emotionally draining. Last time we had to be rescued by boat. This time I was too paranoid to sleep and evacuated us and our pets before the water got in the house.
So once again we were living in a hotel while repairs were being made to our home. This made it harder for internet access and for me to be able to really concentrate on the CureSearch Walk committee. We have been back in the house for a month now and things are moving along. I have kicked it into high gear for the walk and have sent several letters out to local businesses for sponsorship for this year's walk. We have invited a lot of other nonprofit groups that deal in some way with Childhood Cancer to the walk. I would welcome suggestions for local businesses to contact for sponsorship or if you know if an organization we should invite to set up a table at the walk.
We are looking for more teams to sign up to participate in the walk as well. It is only $10 to register for anyone 16 years old and up and that counts towards your fundraising goal. Anyone under that is free to register. To sign up click this link: www.curesearchwalk.org/louisville
Anyone is welcome to join our team Angels for Ambrosia as well. You can be a virtual walker if you can't make it on walk day which is August 29th at Waterfront Park in Louisville by the Big Four Pedestrian Bridge. Be on the look out for at least one fundraiser coming up for our team. Details on that to come!
With that being said, after Ambrosia passed Wes and I decided to wait at least a year before deciding if we wanted another baby. A year came and went...then another 5 months went by. We decided to start trying again and am happy to say we are expecting a baby boy at the beginning of October.
Braeden is excited to be a big brother again and really wanted a brother this time. It has also brought up a lot of emotions for him in thinking about his sister and wondering about this baby. A few weeks ago Braeden had his yearly well check up. The doctor that saw him is the same one who initially sent us to Kosair with Ambrosia. He came to the hospital after Ambrosia's diagnosis, called after CT scans, and called after he saw her obituary in the paper. He asked how long it had been since Ambrosia passed and said that now that Braeden is older he may start to think a lot more about the situation and have more questions. Just the week leading up to his appointment Braeden had started making a lot more statements that started with "If this baby dies...". I told the doctor that and he said it was normal.
I told the doctor I had told Braeden that I was doing everything I could to be healthy to ensure the baby was healthy. The doctor at that point stopped me and told me that what happened with Ambrosia wasn't my fault. In my heart I know that to be true but I can't help but take precautions as no one really knows the cause of childhood cancer. I also said that I told Braeden I couldn't promise this baby wouldn't die. That is not a realistic thing to promise a kid especially when we have been through what we have.
I have had one high risk ultrasound and so far everything looks completely normal for this baby. All development looks good and nothing out of the ordinary can be seen. I will have another high risk ultrasound this month and the doctor specifically wants to see the liver to ease his and my mind since Ambrosia's tumor was on the liver.
In other news, this year in April our house flooded with almost 20 inches of water. This was the second time since October of 2013. The first time was just 4 months after Ambrosia passed and was incredibly hard and emotionally draining. Last time we had to be rescued by boat. This time I was too paranoid to sleep and evacuated us and our pets before the water got in the house.
So once again we were living in a hotel while repairs were being made to our home. This made it harder for internet access and for me to be able to really concentrate on the CureSearch Walk committee. We have been back in the house for a month now and things are moving along. I have kicked it into high gear for the walk and have sent several letters out to local businesses for sponsorship for this year's walk. We have invited a lot of other nonprofit groups that deal in some way with Childhood Cancer to the walk. I would welcome suggestions for local businesses to contact for sponsorship or if you know if an organization we should invite to set up a table at the walk.
We are looking for more teams to sign up to participate in the walk as well. It is only $10 to register for anyone 16 years old and up and that counts towards your fundraising goal. Anyone under that is free to register. To sign up click this link: www.curesearchwalk.org/louisville
Anyone is welcome to join our team Angels for Ambrosia as well. You can be a virtual walker if you can't make it on walk day which is August 29th at Waterfront Park in Louisville by the Big Four Pedestrian Bridge. Be on the look out for at least one fundraiser coming up for our team. Details on that to come!
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